Monday, November 24, 2008

May God Remove the Scales

I have been praying lately that God will remove from my eyes any scales which prevent me from seeing that which I am supposed to.

But I have to giggle when I say that prayer because saying "scales" always makes me think of Bob, my extra FAT, bright orange goldfish whose open-mouth smiles are are magnified by the water and glass bowl he is in.

It kinda creeps me out to think about his scales on my eyes, but I'm sure God understands that it's just a metaphor. :-)

But, in addition to praying that I may behold the people and events in my life as I should, I also pray that I am beheld in the way that I should be. I pray that others can see me for who I really am as a person...that they may see through my exterior armor to glimpse the real me that is inside. And for all my weaknesses and failings, I hope they still find me beautiful (or, more likely, find me beautiful for the first time).

I think love is the only thing that can remove scales from one's eyes. Can we truly behold a person without also loving them, even if it is not romantic? And really, who has ever seen me? For that matter, who has ever seen you for what you really, truly are? To do so is to love so, I believe.

My friend Thomas wrote me quite an eloquent email about 3 weeks ago which got me thinking further about this topic. I noticed that even though he lives all the way out in Iowa, he "sees" something deeply personal about myself which others who I hang out with often haven't even bothered to notice. How can it be that someone who lives 900 miles away sees me more clearly than the person I was hanging out with most regularly?

In all relationships, I guess I have to strike that perfect balance of depth and surface. I want to enjoy surface-level fun and silliness, while at the same time truly seeing him and truly being seen.

This gives a whole new meaning to the desire "to see and be seen!"