Monday, December 08, 2008

I couldn't sleep.

I couldn't sleep last night.

I'm sure it's because of the stress I'm under. My life is absolute insanity right now with all the things I'm supposed to accomplish.

There just hasn't been enough time for sleep, and so I haven't done much of it.

But last night, when I finally crawled into bed around midnight, I tossed and turned endlessly. My body was exhausted, but my mind was racing, going over and over again the never-ending checklist that seems to be forever in my mind. My mind was systematically planning every minute of the next day, and my body was resenting the fact that my schedule would take me through the evening to where I'd get little sleep the next night also.

When it became 2 AM and my body was still alert, I finally decided to get up and write substitute plans. It's funny how, after I canceled a day's worth of obligations (which took me an hour to do, since I also had several urgent emails to send and even a phone call to make), I suddenly became calm enough to sleep. My breathing pattern was distinctively different as soon as I slipped back under the covers. A real slumber was only moments away now. Thank goodness.

I got up at 5 AM, drove my substitute plans into school, organized my classroom, shoveled the paperwork from my desk into a bag (so that I could spend my day off grading papers), and came home to write you this blog, dear reader.

I write because I'm wide awake again, and for some reason, writing helps me calm down and center myself. So I knew I needed to write to you before I would feel ready for sleep. And now that my eyelids are heavy, I think I finally am. Zzzz...