Sunday, January 04, 2009

Help! Mark Zuckerberg is Reading My MIND!!

OK, I'm starting to get freaked out.

You know those little advertisements on the right hand side of your Facebook page? Mine are starting to SPEAK to me. They seem to magically know precisely where I am in the stages of a relationship, and they're trying to give me advice!

As I stated previously, I feel like a girl of many false starts. This is because the last few months have been peppered with confusion from the opposite sex. My resiliency is starting to wane, but my observation skills have only grown more keen, and thus I have noticed a correlation between the Facebook advertisements and my status in life.

With all this confusion from the opposite sex, there's been no need to change my profile's relationship status, so how can those crafty advertisements be so spot-on with the kind of advice I'd need? If this only happened once or twice, I'd think it to be just a coincidence. But the rollercoaster ride of my heart is faster than that (not by my choice!)...and the advertisements are managing to keep up and be perfectly timed. Incredible.

When I'm not focused on meeting the next someone, I get this friendly little reminder:

Then, if I have met a nice new guy, my computer must sense when I'm gearing up to go out on that first official date, because I'll get this:

Then, as the days pass and I wonder about my compatibility with the guy, this little advert appears:

As the weirdness starts to flood in, I'm asked:

And then, when we've reached the end of our short little walk together, I get this mocking little told-you-so:

How and why does this happen, dear reader? Not even my Facebook statuses have revealed what I'm up to in my personal life. So which of my closest friends is spilling it all to Mark Zuckerberg?