Thursday, January 15, 2009

My Morning Routine

The last two days I have completely forgotten to put on deodorant!! Argh! This is so embarrassing!!

What is wrong with me? Why am I forgetting such an important staple of my morning routine?

An oversight like this is rare for me and happens only once or twice a year. Did I just use up my quota for 2009?

Perhaps this is happening because I have gotten up later than usual lately. I have taken on the terrible habit of bringing my cell phone into bed with me after its first alarm goes off. It's like I'm inviting it to stay warm with me under the blankets, thus muffling its complaint under my comforter.

I have a series of about a dozen alarms or so. The first one gives me the message to be thankful for this new day I am starting, and--while I had every intention of saying a little prayer of thanks at that time--my sleepy eyes don't even read it now, and I throw myself back into bed without thinking.

Then another one goes off 10 minutes later, saying that I should put my feet on the floor. Ten minutes later, my cell phone asks, "Are you sure you're up?"

I even have an alarm that tells me when I should be slurping down my oatmeal. A subsequent alarm tells me that I may "Jump back into bed for a 30-minute nap!" My sixth alarm is meant only to warm me that "In another 5 minutes, surely get up!"

Alarm #7 sends me to my wardrobe. The message reminds me that I should "Pick out clothes!" at that precise moment in order to stay on time for departure. My eighth alarm tells me that not only should the water of my shower be running, but that I should most definitely be in it.

The next alarm says I should "Get outta the shower!" followed 7 minutes later by another which says, "You should be dressed by now!" My final alarm reminds me to open my living room blinds for the doves and my bedroom blinds for my little ficus tree.

Obviously, I now need a twelfth alarm that commands, "Slick on some deodorant!" We'll add that to the list for tomorrow morning. :-)