I’m beginning to notice that God is teaching my new motherly
heart to find its joy in the happiness of my child and not necessarily myself.
I can be sure that God is giving me these lessons gradually,
for Michael has already determined what my 33rd birthday gifts will
be on May 31st – and they are all technically needed items for the
care of Baby.
This reminds me of an episode of American Dreams, where a soon-to-be
married girl was given a blender as a Christmas gift. She was terribly
disappointed, for she could find no joy in the blender except to see it as another
necessary tool with which she would need to do work. Rather, she would have liked to have gotten a Christmas gift
that was something personal and frivolous or indulgent just for the happiness of
herself.
But married life is not about a person’s self.
By its very nature, marriage was designed by God to be a mutual
giving-up-of-self that is life-giving.
Joy is found in delighting the OTHER person, not yourself. For, at this state of life, we have come
to realize the very limited satisfaction of self-joy. Doing something for yourself only goes so far. Doing something for someone you love can
have eternal benefit!
Yesterday, Michael gave several gifts to me which were far
more valuable than the selfish gifts I normally would crave, such as a new handbag
or a new piece of jewelry. Michael’s
first gift to me was that he got up early, allowing me to sleep in, since I had
spent the better part of the night getting up several times with Macy, taking her
outside for the throwing-up and diarrhea she’s been plagued with in the last 24
hours.
Then he went and changed the oil in our cars, came back for
daily mass across the street, left again to run various errands for us, came
back to mow the lawn, and eventually did laundry for me and vacuumed the whole
house. He even finished washing
the dishes when I got distracted half-way through, and he prepared a delicious
dinner of glazed baby back ribs with a baked potato and snap peas. After dinner, he took me to see the movie called, “What to
Expect When You’re Expecting,” a hilarious and timely comedy about pregnancy for
us to enjoy.
The day left me feeling humbled by the quantity of hard work
that my husband can produce in one day.
All of these tasks were GIFTS to me. He worked hard on boring things so that I might find life a
bit easier, a bit happier. God
bless him. And, God, please teach
me to bless my husband more abundantly!
As Michael and I prepare to add a new addition to our family,
it makes sense that God would ask more of my heart – and that He would ask me
in particular to find my joy in the happiness of my husband and child. It is time to be taught His subsequent lessons. And I am ready for them!
